The Reality of Being a Shorty

I’m not going to lie, I’m short. I was never the tallest in class growing up and through the years, I slowly moved towards the front of the line (the short side) in height. Genetics were not in my favor. My mother is a shorty too. My father is not tall. I guess I should have known what to expect.

When I was school-aged, I watched my older sister grow up and admired her final height of 5′-7″ (although I am not sure where she got it from?!). Those recessive genes became my biggest desire. I would compare my stature to all of my friends and get disappointed as each one surpassed me in height. In 7th grade when my ‘special friend’ came to visit, I thought “This is it! Now is my time!” Every morning I would wake up and look in the mirror. I looked taller. I felt taller. I mean my body was maturing in many other ways so why not height, right?!

And then I went for my yearly physical to only be disappointed. “You grew 1 inch.”

What?! Wait a minute?! I got my period so shouldn’t I be going through some sort of growth spurt?!

Height was never meant to be part of me.

After many years of complaining to my parents about my height, how it was their fault I was such a shorty, I finally gave up. What was the point? Complaining wasn’t going to make me taller. I arrived at my final height of 5′-1 1/2″ at 16 and remained there until I hit 30. It has only been downhill since then. At my latest physical (age 39) I only measured 5′-0 1/4″. Don’t ask me how I shrunk 1 1/4″ already. I am a bit shocked myself.

Being a shorty has its pros and cons. Not going to lie, it does suck most of the time.

The Cons

  • I am constantly getting neck aches from looking up at tall people. At home, I am currently the shortest. My husband is over a foot taller than me and my pre-teen (almost teen – EEK!) daughter surpassed me about a year ago.  At work it seems as if every person there is ten times my height. Not only do I look up all the time, I take 4-5 steps back. At my in-laws I am the shortest as well. For once it would be nice to be taller than someone.
  • Clothes… not sure who created Petite sizes but it wasn’t a short person. According to most fashion lines, Petites is for those 5′-4″ or under. Basically, no matter if I buy Petites or Misses, I am hemming my pants. It is a good thing I come from a long line of women who sew. I have gotten really good with a needle and a sewing machine.
  • But pants are not the only item that there are issues. Tops are usually too long and well, you can’t hem a top that has writing on it. You might hem part of the inspirational quote off and be left with “Strong As A…” (wait a minute, I am sure the word ‘Mother’ was there before…).
  • Then there is the kitchen. I have gotten very used to climbing on top of the counters and praying there is no food on them when I do. It just seems that everything I need is on the top shelf of the upper cabinets. Why do you ask? Because my husband is selfish when it comes to the kitchen. He puts what he needs on the other two shelves of the upper cabinets because that is his eye level and my stuff winds up in the heavens of the top shelf. He does this with the fridge too. For now I am mobile and in shape enough to climb the counters but what happens when I am 80?!
  • Cars. We are a 2 car household and we never share because of our height differences. We would constantly bitch when we would need to share our cars. My husband’s car is set for a tall person: seat all the way back and low. My car is set for a short person: seat all the way up front and high that you wonder how a person can fit in the car to drive. Driving to Florida in one car this past October was a nightmare.
  • The aisles of the grocery store are fun as well. The product I need is always, ALWAYS, on the top shelf. And half the time, in the back on the top shelf because supply has run out. If you see a woman scaling the racks in  your store, it is most likely me, Spider Woman. I climb the metal racks, the freezer racks, any and all of the ones I need to reach. I don’t care if I get yelled at by employees. Hey, if the shelf isn’t full and the item is on top, that isn’t my fault. And yes, I know of liability. Just make sure the shelves are built correctly. I am sure they can hold my petite shortiness.
  • I look young. I look so young and being short just aides in how young I look. I have never looked as old as I am. Some see this as a good thing, but honestly, it hasn’t been. When I had my daughter at 26 I was often mistaken for a teen mom. I saw the dirty looks I got from people in the mall as I walked around with my daughter in a stroller. Even now, many think I am 29 instead of 39. I remind people I have a 12 year old child but it doesn’t help. Embarrassingly, I can fit into kid clothing. Couldn’t you just picture me wearing clothes from Justice?! The worst part of being short and being mistaken for someone younger is I have never ever felt like a real adult. Sure, I am a loving wife and mother and am an adult in that sense but when I dress or wear makeup, I feel like a little girl playing house. In prior employments I was never taken seriously because I was the short little girl. I’ve been viewed this way so often that I see myself as that.
  • You become someone’s arm rest. Everyone thinks that since the top of your head is available that it is an invite for their elbow or arm. Let me just say this… no, my head is not your armrest. Do not stick it there or I will smack you.
  • And… I am always the last one to know when it is raining…

The Pros… Yes, There Really Are Some

There aren’t many. But when looking at the reality of something, even though I am a hardcore pessimist (hello depression!), I should look at the positives. At least that is what my therapist tells me…

  • I can fit in kids clothes.  Yes, this is both a con and a pro. Although it is embarrassing, it can also be helpful financially since children’s clothing runs cheaper than adults. My womanly hips are not fitting into any pair of jeans in that section but I have bought several plain tanks and tees. It helped as well in Disney World when I wanted a sweatshirt with Donald Duck (my fave!) on it. The kid size was $5 cheaper. Score!
  • I can fit in small spaces. Hide and seek proved well with me. If I need to be alone, I can just squeeze myself into the bottom of the coat closet. And, being serious now, God forbid, if an active shooter came through at work, I could easily fit in the corner underneath my desk. Maybe not so positive is that I am the only one who can fit in our crawl space. Not exactly a grand beautiful place to be but it does house the wine we are aging. So if I wanted to, I could sit down there, hide and get drunk.
  • My tall child can’t complain to me that’s she’s tall. She has done this and I just stared at her perplexed. I actually asked her why she was complaining about this to me, the short one. Then I sent her whiny butt over to complain to her father for passing on his genetics.

My list of pros are short (ha ha, see, I used a pun there!) as am I, but I don’t let it bother me as much anymore. I will never be able to change it and at this point, I am not sure I would want to.

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