The Day Jim Cantore Came To Town

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I have been an avid Weather Channel watcher for decades. The storms and catastrophes that Mother Nature can produce have me in awe. I am amazed at the destruction that can be caused and, unfortunately, the many lives that are lost.

When I was in college, I had to reapply to the architecture program after 3 semesters. It was required of all of us undergrads at the time and just because you were in the program didn’t mean you were guaranteed a spot to continue after the review. I feared that review. My drawings skills were average with many others who were way better and my design concepts weren’t highly imaginative. So I sat there, in the midst of waiting for my results thinking about what major I would transfer to if I had failed to receive acceptance. Meteorology was my number one choice. Although I did wind up continuing in the architecture program, in some ways I wish I didn’t.

Weather has been an interest of mine since I was young, the desire not as strong as architecture for me. I slept through Hurricane Gloria in 1985. I was a young kid who took a nap. When I woke up and saw the chaos outside my window, I was in wonderment. A force of nature could do this?! My little 5-year-old brain couldn’t comprehend this. Once we got cable several years later, I would sit and watch the weather channel instead of cartoons after school. Hurricane after hurricane… I watched wide-eyed, mouth gaping.

This continued through college. Every morning I would turn on the Weather Channel and wait for the Local on the 8s to appear so I could see what the weather was like for that day. That is when I started to learn the names of the anchors. That is when I became aware of Jim Cantore. He and Stephanie Abrams would start off my morning. After graduation, when out on my own in the real world, shows started to pop up on the Weather Channel with Jim Cantore hosting. My fave was ‘It Could Happen Tomorrow‘.

As the years passed, it became apparent that when there was a massive hurricane or snowstorm hitting, the Weather Channel always sent Jim Cantore to what they deemed would be the worst hit area.

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Forget Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego, now it is Where in the World is Jim Cantore!

And then the day came, the day all of us dread, the day Jim Cantore came to town!

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In March of 2018, Jim Cantore came to my town. Winter Storm Quinn was approaching and predicted to drop feet of snow. There were many areas where he could of been sent, but instead he was sent to my little town. I sat at my TV watching, debating back and forth whether I should go to where he was and get a selfie with him. In some ways I idolized him. He was what I would have liked to have been had I gone into meteorology.

This storm was so unique, according to Jim, because of the thundersnow. Basically, instead of thunder during a rainstorm, there is thunder during a snowstorm. Aside from the 12+ inches of snow and the thunder, we had blizzard conditions due to the strong winds. A perfect set up for Jim Cantore. And here he was, frankly, scaring the shit out of us residents.

Through the decades, I never actually thought I would be living in an area where Jim would show up. There usually isn’t any weather that would warrant a visit from him. Sure we get snow, but we are used to it in the northeast, even a storm expected to produce more than a foot.

I decided that I should stop fan-girling him and did not go down to meet him. I had until noon that day since the snow really hadn’t started until then. With flakes falling, the wind howling and the growling thunder, I stayed in the comforts of my home watching him on the TV. The warmth of the pellet stove was more comforting then the mess going on outside.

And then it was over. And like with any other winter storm in the northeast, we cleaned up in less than a day. Jim Cantore left for his next adventure in weather. Turns out, he should have gone one town over. We only received about 18″ of snow while the next town received over 26″. All in all, it was both scary and amazing to see the legend of Jim Cantore in our town… a town that would never have been known to most had it not been for him.

 

 

Teen Suicide & Social Media

Over the weekend, a local 16-year-old girl took her life. A permanent solution to probably years of bullying.

And the bully laughed. Instead of stopping her, she watched her jump off the top deck of the mall parking garage. Then, she took a photo and posted it on social media warning people to stay away from the mall. If that wasn’t bad enough, she expressed joy that this young lady was dead and even remarked, “Rest in peace, bitch.”

It’s time we discussed teen suicide and the ramifications of it with the effects of social media.

When I was a senior in high school, a freshman took her life by hanging herself. We were all sad and confused. Even myself although I had been diagnosed with major depressive disorder four years earlier. I was still not fully aware of what goes through a person’s mind to think ending their life is the only way out. That quickly changed when I found myself sitting on the floor of my bedroom with a case cutter to my wrist debating slicing through a major artery. The numbness, the self-loathing, that feeling that the world would be better off without you in it. I understood then.

But I was in high school in the late 1990s… a generation without social media.

Now, I have a 12-year-old daughter. She is only 2 years shy of my first depression diagnosis and 4 years shy of the young woman who committed suicide. I constantly talk to her. She has known about suicide since she was eight because I was unwell and she was old enough to see that. Our discussion can be found in my post “Mommy Is Not Going To Kill Herself“. After learning of this teenager’s demise, I sat my daughter down for another discussion. I didn’t know if the school would bring it up, but I wanted her to know. I told her everything I knew. I told her about the young woman’s suicide and then I told her about the bully.

Her reaction was pretty much the same as mine as we are both highly emotionally and compassionate people. We were heartbroken upon hearing of this girl’s death. We were livid with the bully’s reaction.

How could someone be happy that another person committed suicide?! How can you express it on Snapchat and be okay with that?! How could you then degrade her by calling her a bitch?! I am sure like most teens she thought nothing would happen to her, that she is invincible. The local paper has pretty much kept the story hush-hush as these are minors and the police are still investigating.

The weird thing about all this… I had just watch Friday night’s Dateline concerning the Michelle Carter case. Michelle Carter is in prison for a couple of years because she coaxed her then boyfriend, Conrad Roy, to take his life. They were teens at the time. On the day of his death, he was having second thoughts and left his truck (where he would later die from carbon monoxide poisoning). Michelle told him to get back in and just do it. It is known as the “texting suicide case”.

This recent local event is somewhat similar. It involves teens and cell phones. I believe the Carter case has set a precedent. Will this local bully be charged with anything related to what she put on Snapchat? Who knows. There may be way more concerning the young woman and her bully on all forms of social media.

And that is the issue, isn’t it?! Social media. We can lay it all out there. Say anything we want and hide behind the cell phone or computer screen. The problem is, whatever you say on social media is there forever and it can come back to hurt you days or years later. But once again, teens think they are invincible. It’s time we told them they aren’t.

My heart breaks for the family and friends of this young woman. I am not sure what could have been done. Her parents lost a child. All these hopes and dreams they must have had for her, taken away by a teenage bully. The pain they must be going through. Then I think of the parents of the bully and the shitstorm that is coming their way. Are they in denial… my kid couldn’t do that, she is a perfect angel and so kind… or have they come to the realization that no matter how good of a parent they are, some kids can be mean, downright cruel and immune to others feelings, almost sociopathic. I hurt for those parents as well.

For  now, I weep internally (because of Lexapro I can’t externally). I cry for the young lady, her family and friends and for the parents of the bully. I am an empathetic creature and want to feel their pain. I will continue to talk with my daughter because I do not want her to become the bully or the victim.

It is Kindness Week at her middle school this week. Kind of fitting with recent events. Today is yellow or ‘joy’ day. I hope the school does mention this teenager’s suicide and the bulling. These kids are not little innocent beings anymore. They need to know because the person who is sitting next to them could be the one contemplating taking their life or the one causing pain and suffering to someone else. They need to know that death is permanent. They need to know that rude comments leave scars. They need to know the damage that can be done.

Teen suicide is real. If you know someone who is in trouble please push them to get help. If they are not willing, stand up and speak for them.2417122_1280x720

In A Little Town Called Bethel(hem)…

Small town America. A town of roughly 18,500 people. There is a nice downtown with quaint shops, a true homey feeling.

And yet, there is something that divides this town.

For years, decades even, the town has displayed a nativity scene during the holidays on P.T. Barnum Square, a triangle piece of land right smack in the middle of the charming downtown. It is where almost all the town events occur. It houses pizza joints, our special ice cream shop and a bridal store among others. I am constantly over there since my gym is right across the street.

The nativity has been an icon to the downtown area, and now, now it is the source of the resident split. This year there is a new nativity:

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I am not going to lie, it is beautiful. Funded by a GoFundMe and several residents, it sits right in front of the Christmas tree. Although breathtaking, it is huge. I mean big, bordering on massive. I think it is because of this reason that certain residents became not irate, but annoyed that other holidays weren’t being represented while the nativity just grew bigger. One resident, an Atheist, decided to submit an application to display a banner on P.T. Barnum Square:

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Well, this caused quite an uproar on the local Facebook pages and within the town itself. This is where true colors showed. This was when I realized we are a town that is divided. There is only love if, if you are a Christian, according to many residents.

A good number of residents didn’t understand why the Atheists would want to put anything on the Square… after-all, they do not celebrate anything. A few told the anonymous Atheist banner submitter to move out of Bethel, that they do not belong there. With all the recent antisemitic news, I, a Jew, began to feel uncomfortable in my own town. People were becoming just downright cruel.

But where this is dark, there is light, right?! Some of us religious minorities spoke up. Inclusion! If you can have a creche on a public, town-owned, piece of property, why not have other things?!

We discussed a possible Menorah (Hanukkah candle holder) and a Kinara (Kwanzaa candle holder). Those of us that wanted inclusion were renewed with honor and strength in the possibility of displaying our faiths, of increasing the knowledge of them to the majority of the town residents who are Christian.

But, the town realized that with all this, they needed a rule. In the first meeting held for the Atheist banner, the room was divided. Majority felt it wasn’t needed, that it was a way for the Atheists to call out themselves (because a nativity on the green doesn’t scream Christianity?!). They thought it ruined the holiday spirit of Bethel, ruined the Christmas feeling of Bethel. Back and forth, back and forth… the good news was that after this first meeting, many people understood the Atheist resident’s desire in the banner, the need to include every member of this town regardless of religious belief. By the second meeting, the banner was approved. A committee has now been formed to look at the long term guidelines to displaying things on the Square.  It has been about 2 weeks since the approval and the only thing on P.T. Barnum Square is the creche & lit Christmas tree. Where is the banner?

I had mixed feelings on all of this. I am Jewish by birth. I am not religious by any means but I take pride in my religion/ethnicity. I light the Menorah every year. I make challah and will bake Hamentaschen for Purim. I love my given Hebrew name (Shalva Maera). I also married a Catholic. He is not religious either which is good because there were no arguments when our daughter was born of which religion to raise her. I have respect for all religions and their practices. I am a very fair and just person. So where did I stand?

I think the nativity is beautiful. It is a great symbol for those that are Christian and deserves to be displayed. But where to display it? The town owns the Square. By displaying a religious symbol on something that is town owned, is this not overstepping the separation between church and state? If the town committee starts allowing all religions to display things during the holiday, what happens when we run out of room on the Square? Are the nativity and banner grandfathered in at their size and everyone else’s displays become smaller?

Ultimately, I am with a minority group of residents concerning a certain solution. Because the land is town owned and because it is not a big piece of land to start displaying everyone’s holiday, I believe it should just be left empty. Leave the walkways and benches. Leave the foliage and landscaping. Leave it to its natural beauty. Move the nativity to one of the many churches.

If you can’t include everyone, then include no one.