…I went 8 years back in time.  I admitted myself to short term psych at the hospital.  This was not an easy decision and now being out with a clear head I know it was the best for me.

This bout of Depression and Anxiety has crippled me.  The amount of weight loss, the constant body ache from shaking, the irrational thoughts.  Honestly, it may be tied for #1 with my PPD.

Last Wednesday, I had a manic Depressive episode in front of many people that I wish would never see me this way.  I’m just happy that these people are my good friends and were there to help.  Jimmy drove me to the hospital where I was admitted overnight in the Behavioral Crisis Center.  What a scary place (but that will be another entry).

In the morning, I had a psych consult with the same doctor who saw me 8 years ago for my consult for PPD.  This time, she saw no need to admit me.  I was taken home.

At home my anxiety rose.  As I said before my house scared me.  My bed scared me.  Sleeping scared me because I thought I either wouldn’t sleep or wouldn’t wake up.  I was delusional.  As Jimmy brought our daughter to dance that evening, my parents brought me to my psychiatrist appointment.  I told her I was afraid to be alone, afraid of what I might do to myself.  She did not like the things I was saying and back to the hospital I went.  This time I stayed.  5 days in short term psych.  The best decision I made.  I was discharged yesterday.

I will go further in depth at another time but for now I would like to thank the staff of 6/7 West, especially my nurses.  I miss them a lot.